let's make some noise (crossed out) changes

So. The moment came, the strong moment of strong decisions on not quitting on myself, again, and again, again. I am irritated and annoyed myself.

They say, to make decisions not detached from your current reality, you need to be sober (well, not a big problem for me), you need to make them in the morning or, at least, in the afternoon (because that's where and when changes start - if the idea not demotivate you on the level of idea in the morning, so you have a lot of chances to fulfill it - just my observations, not common true). And in the evening, we tend to get more excited about the idea of changing itself rather than at all steps that have to be done. 

And I have overheard one idea wondering in my mind for so long, and once even being true, that waking up earlier will let me accomplish way more and way more important stuff. Like writing, for instance. I have realized, it was a pretty bitter feeling, that I have been thinking about myself being a writer but what have I done so far? More overthinking, less writing, more fantasizing, less writing, more fear, less writing. And you don't really see, how all of it eats you alive and puts in a very comfy and warm swamp. And you are safe but not really.

https://vimeo.com/173992190

Freedom! Freedom! I can't move
Freedom, cut me loose!
Freedom! Freedom! Where are you?
Cause I need freedom too!
I break chains all by myself
Won't let my freedom rot in hell
Hey! I'ma keep running
Cause a winner don't quit on themselves.

and don't quit on every single part of freedom: thinking, moving, loving.